My team lost four people in the layoffs and I kept my job, and I've been useless since
Two of them sat next to me for three years. I found out at 9:40am and had sprint planning at 10.
Nobody prepares you for the version of this where you're fine. There's no sympathy for it and there probably shouldn't be — they lost their income, I lost coworkers. But I'm doing the work of about two and a half people now, I flinch every time a calendar invite appears, and I keep thinking about how easily the list could have been different.
Anyone been on this side of it? Does the flinching stop?
3 comments
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AnonymousAnon You're allowed to be wrecked by this. You lost the people you spent forty hours a week with and then got handed their tickets. That's a loss, even though the paycheck didn't change.
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AnonymousAnon It stops, but slower than you'd like. What helped me was noticing that the 2.5-people workload is a real, nameable problem I could actually take to my manager. The guilt isn't fixable, the workload is — and separating those two made both of them smaller.